That attractive sophisticated girl at the bar that you caught coyly looking at you through the mass of barflies, has already studied you from head to toe. You could be standing there looking like you walked straight off the set of Suits, but if you are holding an umbrella-adorned drink or anything its equivalent, you’ve already potentially botched it.
Guys, if you can knock your drink back in one go and don’t have tears in the corners of your eyes, or the drink is served with any other garnish than a slice of fruit, chances are you aren’t looking as smooth as you think.
You should be able to actually taste the alcohol. You want your drink to leave that quasi-pleasant burning sensation at the back of your throat. Doesn’t really sound like something you would sip from a straw eh?
Let's talk.. Spirits
If you’re pounding back tequila shots at a bar in Paceville with your guy friends, clearly you are out to get drunk, it’s that simple.
The idea of hearing your drunken slurs, smelling the tequila on your breath and the odour of it seeping out of your pores, does not really appeal to anyone. Let alone a member of the fairer sex.
No drink says man like beer. It’s appropriate for every occasion, be it a BBQ, a party or whatever shindig you find yourself present at. It shows that you are not going to get trashed, so you are open for conversation.
Beer is linked so much with guys being guys considered that it can be seen to be a comfort zone for guys. You’re safe with a chilled brew clasped in your hand, but it’s like wearing a black suit, it’s classic and safe but you won’t be catching too many eyes with it.
If you’re out to impress a bit, go for a craft beer like one of Stretta’s brews or an ale like Malta’s very own Blue Label. Just try and mix things up a bit. These versions of a classic beer will show that you actually care about what you are drinking. A lager is good but lets face it, everyone has tried a lager.
You aren’t only going to impress the fairer sex with a good beer. A decent beer will get a nod of approval from any seasoned barman. It’s not over extravagant and it doesn’t come off like you’re trying too hard.
A respectable beer should be something that you don’t want to waste by taking on your friend in a chugging contest.
Aside: If there is anyone who wishes to challenge me at this primal and barbaric contest – that proves nothing except that you can consume an absurd amount of carbs in a matter of seconds - I accept.
Let's talk.. Whiskey
The fewer drinks present in your manly beverage, the better. If one can keep their drink to the bare minimum of one, they are doing things right. What shows this better than an exceptional whiskey neat?
A guy patiently sipping at whiskey or a bourbon at the bar gives off an aura of confidence. You can tell he’s got his shit together and he takes pleasure in what he’s drinking.
If you’re wondering why I didn’t mention wine, it’s simple, it is only to be drunk when you are chilling, eating or at a wine bar.
Just don’t be the guy that talks about their drink. There is nothing more annoying than someone who explains their craft beer or whiskey. I’m sure you’ve heard someone do it or seen some YouTuber take the piss. If people want to know about your drink they’ll ask, other than that, keep it to yourself and you’ll be more than fine.